Gripe session

Why is it your kids think you are stupid? Last night a friend of my youngest called seeing if he and a friend could spend the night tonight. The boys don't have school, but my husband does work, so I said I would have to run it by him. One of the boys would have to be here until 5pm Friday. I was planning on cleaning house tomorrow and since we had two of his friends over last weekend, I was looking forward to a quiet weekend. Also, the oldest wasn't happy to hear we might be having friends of the youngest over again. With all that in mind, I said "sorry, no can do." I thought that was the end of it. Silly me! Just a few minutes ago I got a call from the youngest, when I answered he put his friend on the phone. This kid, who I love like he's mine....he spends enough time over here...started to beg: "why can't we spend the night." Now, I believe in being polite, but I hate the bargaining that goes on once I've made my decision. I was firm, but I just hate being put in that position; not only that, but I'm more determined that ever to stick to my guns. What about you, how do you feel about situations like this?

When I was quiet.

"They didn't see me when I was quiet."

That's what my five-year-old said.

I picked him up from school and as usual, asked him how his day
went. I often ask him what he did during the day.

"I got my name put on the board for talking," he said.

The teachers try to be strict about maintaining discipline.
It's a good thing. Even though they can't use the paddle
anymore as they did in my day, they do the best they can with
the techniques they are allowed to use.

If your name is on the board, you can't play during recess.

You can't get on the swings, the slide, or play any of the
sports. If your name is on the board, you're grounded.

"I got my name on the board, but they didn't see me when I was
quiet so I couldn't get it off."

Remember the last speeding ticket that you got?

They didn't see you when you were going slower and traveling at
a reasonable speed. Down the hill and in a hurry and here comes
the blue lights.

They didn't see you when you were quiet!

The boss catches you just when you doze for a second (well maybe
longer than a second) after diligently working all day.

They didn't see you when you were quiet.

Your wife catches your eyes wandering as you admire the
architecture of an elegant building that just happens to have a
shapely female in front of it.

They didn't see you when you were quiet.

Why doesn't the world take into account all of the times that
you were quiet?

Why do you suffer so long for a moment's indiscretion?

How can a few minutes take an eternity to make up for?

Because of one of life's simple principles,
it's a lot easier and faster to mess up than to clean up.

Harsh words uttered in five seconds can damage a relationship
for five years.

All of us are still in school.
We still have teachers.
We still pass or fail tests.
There are still paddles in one form or another
and there is still the board.

With many of the things in our lives,
we simply need to slow down and be quiet.

That way we won't miss playtime.

I didn't write this,
I wish I had.

I stopped by work this morning for a few minutes. I work in a middle school and got there before the day began. As I was walking down the hall I heard the following announcement: "Faculty, I want you all to be thinking code red today." Well, my kids drink code red, but I knew she wasn't refering to that. There was going to be a lock down drill at some point today. This is the first such drill we have had in the three years I have been there. The faculty was scurrying around with their red notebooks reviewing what needed to be done. I cannot tell you how it saddened me to think this sort of thing is necessary. And then I thought about the upcoming elections and realized it made sense. Do you suppose our parents and grandparents felt the same way when air raid drills were started? I remember having those drills in elementary school; man am I that old? I always thought it was stupid for the boys to protect the girls. What use was a bunch of girls with no boys around? At that time I didn't realize that no one would be of use if there was an air raid. I can't wait until my son gets home from school today to find out how it went, how long it lasted and how everyone reacted.

Are you brave enough to be seen like this? 

Who are we, really? Do you see yourself as an independent being, or are you the roles you play, friend, spouse, sibling? I can't help but think that most of us are not as comfortable as we should be in our own skin. We buy into preconceived notions as to what we should look like. I will never be tall, skinny blonde. If I work really hard, I can be skinny. I can even be a blonde, although I don't really have the coloring to pull off the hair color. But there is absolutely nothing I can do to be tall. I accepted that a long time ago. I have never had the correct body type either. When I was a teenager, Twiggy was the personification of beauty. She is reminiscent of a lot of today's models and Paris Hilton has her body shape. Me? No way, busty and hippy all the way. Years ago I am sure I would have been considered good breeding stock. I accepted the fact that I would never be a tall, skinny blonde long before I accepted the fact that I have curves. Actually, I'm not sure I have ever accepted the fact that I have curves. If I had been born 120 years ago, I would be the envy of a lot of people, but it was not to be my fate. So I walk around in a body I hope no one notices...yeah right.

This past year, though, I was given a gift. It was the gift of discovering who I really am. I learned that I am more than the outward appearances. When chemo caused my hair to fall out, I walk around without a wig. I did this, not so much because I was brave as many people seemed to believe, but because I was too hot under the wig. I also felt like a liar wearing the wig. At that point in my life I was bald. It was who I was, at least on the outside.

What about the inside? Well, I was the person I thought I was. I was strong and tough. I was able to handle what was thrown my way. The one thing I did learn about myself which came as a surprise was the fact that my faith was stronger than I had believed it to be. Imagine my surprise at realizing this. Feeling calm in the face of adversity is truly a wonderful gift.

I also learned that I have affected more people that I would have thought in life’s journey. People who where on the outside of my circle came forward and offered to take me to chemo or fix meals for my family. People who weren’t really phone friends called just to see how I was doing and if I needed anything. This was really touching to me since my best friend of 11 years had moved away less than 2 months before my diagnosis. I have always been happy in my own company, but to know I had people I could call on if need be was wonderful.

Who are we? We are a sum of our experiences. Do we realize this? Probably not; getting to know ourselves is something we do not value. And that is a shame.
 

Five rules for hapiness (not my spelling!)
One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously
for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he
decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway;
it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all
grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the
donkey >realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then,
to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was
astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the
donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step
up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the
animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon,
everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of
the well and happily trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to
getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of
our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just
by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less

NOW --------

Enough of that crap . .

The donkey later came back and bit the shit out of the farmer who had
tried to bury him. The gash from the bite got infected, and the farmer
eventually died in agony from septic shock.

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:

When you do something wrong and try to cover your ass,
it always comes back to bite you.

Five rules for hapiness (not my spelling!)
One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously
for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he
decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway;
it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all
grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the
donkey >realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then,
to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was
astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the
donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step
up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the
animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon,
everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of
the well and happily trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to
getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of
our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just
by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less

NOW --------

Enough of that crap . .

The donkey later came back and bit the shit out of the farmer who had
tried to bury him. The gash from the bite got infected, and the farmer
eventually died in agony from septic shock.

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:

When you do something wrong and try to cover your ass,
it always comes back to bite you.





 

Five Rules for Happiness

Full Circle

Got milk? 

This cute, curly headed child, my youngest, has discovered classic rock. He gets a big kick out of the fact that I remember most of the songs he is discovering and will sing along to the radio. Why is it most kids think they are the ones to create whatever is considered cool at the moment? All I know is that it is a real kick to hear songs that bring back memories from college and high school, 30 some years ago!

Projects

I am the first one to admit I'm not the best housekeeper. That's why I love what I posted yesterday, I just didn't know those were the reasons for my not doing anything. Well, today I decided to attack the pantry. The shelves are (were) crowded and things were hard to see. I knew I had old food in there and probably duplicates of things I shouldn't. So I started with the easiest shelf, that is the one I didn't nead a chair to really reach the back. Took everything out, put it on the table. Had one of the boys bring me an empty laundry basket. In there I put the things I only use a few times a year: brown sugar, granulated sugar, flour, baking power, cooking oats. I threw away the things that were old, had the oldest come take that bag out. It was too heavy, so we started a new bag. Grouped things together according to category: soups, Mexican food, tomatoes, olives. I set the brand new organizer in place and proceeded to place things back in the pantry. And then I thought! Hey this isn't too bad, let me try another shelf. Did I pick a lower one, of course not. So I'm up and down the chair, someone comes in and helps me with something as I'm climbing back up onto the chair and then leaves the room. I get what I want, turn to get off the chair, and guess what!? I was surrounded by stuff on the floor; the garbage bag, the trash can, my shoes. Luckily my distress signal was answered. Of course, at this point, I was hot and tired and didn't feel like finishing, but since we needed the table for dinner, I had no choice. The spice shelf was the best. It seems that instead of really looking to make sure I have a spice, I just go out and buy more. I have enough cinnamon for years! Oh well, at least the pantry is done. The problem is that it looks so good, I now want to tackle the cabinets downstairs. Well, as Scarlett is fond of saying, "I'll do that tomorrow."

MY PHILOSOPHY On HOUSECLEANING!

I don't do windows because... I love birds and don't want one to run into a clean window and get hurt.

I don't wax floors because... I am terrified a guest will slip, hurt themselves, I'll feel terrible and they may sue me.

I don't mind the dust bunnies because... They are very good company, I have named most of them, and they agree with everything I say.

I don't disturb cobwebs because... I want every creature to have a home of their own.

I don't Spring Clean because... I love all the seasons and don't want the others to get jealous.

I don't pull weeds in the garden because... I don't want to get in God's way, he is an excellent designer.

I don't put things away because... My husband will never be able to find them again.

I don't do gourmet meals when I entertain because... I don't want my guests to stress out over what to make when they invite me over for dinner.

I don't iron because... I choose to believe them when they say "Permanent Press".

I don't stress much on anything because... "A Type" personalities die young and I want to stick around and become a wrinkled up crusty ol' woman!!!!